so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
