What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
