They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
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If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
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I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
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