i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
This baby is an asshole
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize
