Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
