just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
