Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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