i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
We don't watch enough power rangers
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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