Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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