I just pynch a tree in the face
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i just google imaged poop.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
