Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
