How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
