You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
