Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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