I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
