so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I didn't notice because vodka
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
