what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
