I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Randomize
