Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
