You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Randomize
