we're blogging at a bar
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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