I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
