You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize