Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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