Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
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