im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
