Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize