ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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