we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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