Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i would punch a child for taco bell
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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