I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
