Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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