it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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