how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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