so explain again why im purple
no
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
