I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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