So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
