True but thats because hes a fetus.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize