you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
