But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
im holly from the hills drunk
he was CRYING into my vagina
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my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
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fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize