take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
