question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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