You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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