put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
where does the pee come out of this thing
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
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He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
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It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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