I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
