She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize