I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Randomize