David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
