He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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