who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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